The People vs. Ms. Question/Transcript
Transcript for The People vs. Ms. Question Narrator: Looks like another ordinary day in the city. (Scene: an ice cream truck. Becky and Bob are standing in front of it, and the ice cream vendor is handing Bob a cone. As he prepares to bite into it, something streaks by him, taking the cone and leaving a yellowish cloudy trail. As it passes, all that can be seen are some lingering question marks. Bob has a confused look on his face.) Narrator: Hey! That wasn’t ordinary! (Bob chatters and holds his hands out.) Becky: Look! Ms. Question! (Becky points to Ms. Question, who is flying above them on her question mark board, eating the ice cream cone.) Ms. Question: Ha ha ha ha! (She swoops down and grabs a lady’s purse, leaving her in a quandry.) Lady: (gasps) Who could have done such a thing? (From above, Ms. Question cackles and zips away. At the grocery store, Mr. Botsford is pushing a shopping cart full of groceries to the car. As he hums to himself, a yellow streak flies by him, taking his groceries. Becky and Bob show up in front of him.) Mr. Botsford:: Help! I’ve-- wait! What just happened? Becky: Are you okay, Dad? You look a little befuddled. Mr. Botsford:: I just lost my beans-- all three kinds. Becky: (to Bob) You know what we have to do, Bob. Word UP! (Becky takes off with Bob, but her dad is too confused to realize it. WordGirl catches up with Ms. Question and dodges question marks being flung at her. Suddenly Ms. Question stops, and WordGirl flies past her at top speed, nearly ending up in outer space.) Ms. Question: Did you really think you’d catch me, WordGirl? (Ms. Question flies abruptly into a giant inflatable balloon, then falls into an inflatable car. The camera pans out, and we see that she is on the used car lot. Colorful monster floats hover above, and a large “SALE” sign is on the side of the building.) Used Car Salesman: Hello. I see you were attracted to the used car lot by our famous monster sign. What kind of car were you looking for? Ms. Question: What kind of car would suit me? (She hits him with a blast from her question mark on her chest.) Used Car Salesman: Say, what’s going on? You’ve gotten me all befuddled. Ms. Question: Will you please give me the keys for that car? (She looks over at a hot pink convertible.) Used Car Salesman: Oh, you want to take it for a test drive? (Ms. Question grabs the keys and runs toward the car. WordGirl swoops in behind her.) WordGirl: Stop! She’s stealing your car! Used Car Salesman: I know. With this monster sale, we’re practically giving cars away. WordGirl: Come on, Huggy! (Ms. Question jumps into the car and cackles.) Ms. Question: When will you ever catch me, WordGirl? (She puts the keys in the ignition, and tries to drive forward, but the car doesn’t move.) Ms. Question: Come on, why won’t you start? (WordGirl drops the car tires onto her, trapping her.) WordGirl: It looks like your crime spree ends here, Ms. Question! Ms. Question: Hmph. Narrator: A few days later at the courtroom, Ms. Question is on trial. (Scene: The courtroom. Ms. Question sits in the defendant’s seat with her arms crossed. Becky is seated in the audience behind her. District Attorney Botsford walks in front of her.) Mrs. Botsford: Now Bob, can you point to the person who stole your ice cream? (Bob, who is sitting in the witness stand, points at Ms. Questions and chatters angrily.) Mrs. Botsford: Thank you. I’m very sorry for your loss. (She hands Bob a replacement ice cream cone.) Mrs. Botsford: But don’t worry. It is my job to bring justice to the citizens of this town. I will do that by showing evidence that proves Ms. Question is guilty of stealing. Now, will the next witness please state your name and occupation? (The Used Car Salesman steps up to the witness stand, smooths his hair out, and takes a seat.) Used Car Salesman: I’m the used car salesman. I sell pre-owned vehicles at a substantial savings. Mrs. Botsford: Mr. Car Salesman, did Ms. Question steal a car off your lot? Used Car Salesman: Yes, she did. (The audience gasps.) Mrs. Botsford: Go on, Mr. Salesman. Used Car Salesman: She befuddled me with her questions and then stole the car. Mrs. Botsford: I have no more questions, but perhaps Ms. Question would like her turn at questioning the witness. (chuckles) Ms. Question: Can’t I question YOU? (The audience gasps again.) Judge: (banging his gavel) Order in the court! Since Ms. Question is representing herself, she can question District Attorney Botsford. Ms. Question: Why are you trying to put me in jail? Mrs. Botsford: Because you broke the law and you have to be punished. That’s called justice. Ms. Question: Did you see me commit these crimes? Mrs. Botsford: No. But Bob said that you stole his ice cream. And the used car-- Ms. Question: How can you be sure I did anything wrong? (She walks in front of District Attorney Botsford, and bombards her with a blast from her question mark.) Ms. Question: Could I have thought Bob was offering me his cone? Mrs. Botsford: Well-- maybe. I don’t know. Why would he do that? (Ms. Question blasts her again.) Ms. Question: Do you have doubt? Mrs. Botsford: You-- you got me-- uh, a little befuddled. Ms. Question: Why did you even become a lawyer? Mrs. Botsford: I believe in justice... I think. I’m not really sure right now. Ms. Question: Oh. Judge: I think this case is over. Ms. Question, you are free to go on the grounds that we’re all too befuddled to find you guilty of any crime. (He bangs his gavel again. Ms. Question picks up her briefcase and heads for the door, but grabs Bob’s ice cream cone in the process.) Mrs. Botsford: (still confused) Oh! If I can’t win a case as easy as this one, maybe I shouldn’t be a lawyer. Oh! I quit! (The audience gasps and speaks excitedly amongst themselves.) Narrator: What’s this? Mrs. Botsford giving up her job? Oh, this is a sad day for justice. (A view from outside the courtroom shows that it is raining. There is a lightning bolt and a clap of thunder.) (Scene: The Botsford house. Mrs. Botsford is busy mopping the floor in the kitchen. Tim Botsford is sitting on the couch watching with a concerned face.) Mr. Botsford:: (in a pleasant voice) Hey there, honey. When do you think you’ll be done cleaning so I can make my 3-bean salad? Mrs. Botsford: You’re being impatient. Ha-ha. Mr. Botsford:: Ha-ha. I know. I haven’t been able to cook in here. Ahh! (Mrs. Botsford laughs. Becky and Bob comes in.) Becky: Wow. Still working in the kitchen, eh? Don’t you miss fighting for justice in the courtroom? Mrs. Botsford: Oh, I can fight for justice anywhere, honey. Is there something you two wanted? Becky: Bob and I want to try some more of your delicious cookies. Mrs. Botsford: Okay. (looking in the cookie jar) Oh! There’s no more cookies! That’s very strange because I know there was one left when I looked an hour ago. Becky: That’s okay. I’ll eat an apple. Mrs. Botsford: EMERGENCY FAMILY MEETING! Mr. Botsford:: Why? Becky: Calling a family meeting just for a cookie? Mrs. Botsford: This isn’t just about a cookie, Becky. It’s about justice! Tim, exactly where were you an hour ago? Mr. Botsford:: Helping you put new shelf paper in the cabinets. Mrs. Botsford: So, TJ, exactly where were you an hour ago today? TJ: I was watching TV. Mrs. Botsford: And what were you doing while watching said television? TJ: Eating a cookie. Mrs. Botsford: Aha! I rest my case. (Everyone looks at her.) Mr. Botsford:: Oooookay. Mrs. Botsford: See, Becky, I told you. I’d solve the case of the missing cookie. Now where did I put the marble polish? (Mr. Botsford, Becky and Bob all walk toward the kitchen table where TJ is.)' TJ: (whispering to Becky) I wish Mom would go back to work. Becky: Sure does seem like she misses it. Mr. Botsford:: And I wouldn’t mind getting my kitchen back. (Mrs. Botsford picks up a large sander and starts polishing the counter.) Narrator: Later, at the Jewelry store... (Scene: The jewelry store. Ms. Question is wandering around inside.) Reginald: Is there something I can help you with? Ms. Question: Would you give me that question mark tiara? Reginald: Do you mean to try it on? Because only serious buyers are allowed to-- (She blasts him with question marks.) Ms. Question: Could I just have it? Reginald: I don’t know. I mean, the tiara is priceless, but... I’m not sure what to do. I’m-- so befuddled. Oh, here. Just take it. (Ms. Question cackles and runs off.) Reginald: Wait. I’m confused. I didn’t say you could steal it, or did I? Hmm. Narrator: Meanwhile, at the Mayor’s office... (Scene: The Mayor’s office. WordGirl is talking to the Mayor.)' Mayor: WordGirl, here’s my problem. Ms. Question is on a crime spree, and even when we catch her, we can’t keep her in jail without District Attorney Botsford. She’s the only one who can go to court, present evidence to the judge, and bring Ms. Question to-- ooh, uh, what’s the word? Uh... WordGirl: You must mean justice. It means fairness, as in District Attorney Botsford’s courtroom skills will bring justice to the victims of Ms. Question when she puts her in jail for her crimes. Mayor: Thank you, WordGirl. You always seem to know the right, uh... (pauses) WordGirl: Word? Mayor: Yes! Yes. Word. Word is the word. WordGirl: Well, I think I just might have a plan that will get District Attorney Botsford back to work so we can bring Ms. Question to justice! Narrator: A short time later at the Botsfords’... (Scene: The Botsford house. Mr. Botsford is sitting at the dining room table with a deck of cards, talking to TJ.) TJ: Well, I’d rather play checkers, but-- Mrs. Botsford: It’s decided. Family meeting! (She is standing on a ladder next to them painting the ceiling pink. Becky and Bob come through the front door.) Becky: Hi. What’s going on? Mrs. Botsford: I’m helping your father and TJ decide on a just solution to their disagreement. TJ: It’s okay, Mom. I’ll play Crazy Eights. Mr. Botsford:: And I’m happy to play checkers. Really. You can finish painting the house, hon. Mrs. Botsford: No! No, no, no, no, no. I want to make sure that justice is served. Mr. Botsford:: Ehh... TJ: Here we go! Mrs. Botsford: Now, TJ, isn’t it true that you were the one who ate the last cookie? TJ: Yes! Didn’t I already say that I did? Mrs. Botsford: And the last pickle? TJ: Yes, that too. Mrs. Botsford: So it’s only fair and just that your father be the one who gets to pick the game. (Becky hears the alarm going off at the bank with her super-hearing.) Becky: (clearing throat) I don’t mean to interrupt, but I was wondering if Mom could take Bob and me to the bank. Mr. Botsford:: Yes! TJ: Yeah! Mrs. Botsford: The bank? Becky: Well, I found a quarter, and I want to deposit it in my savings account. Uh, you told me every penny counts. Mrs. Botsford: Oh, that’s my little saver. Let’s go! (She leaves with Becky.) TJ: (to Tim) Do you think Mom is ever going to go back to her job? ''(Mrs. Botsford comes back to the table.) Mrs. Botsford: Oh, I forgot. Court is adjourned. Fifteen minute recess! (She leaves again.) Mr. Botsford:: I hope so, son. I hope so. (Scene: The bank. Mrs. Botsford, Becky and Bob have gone inside. The find a roomful of people standing around looking confused. At the counter, Ms. Question is talking to the bank teller, who is also confused and is putting money into a bag.) Female Bank Teller: Wait. Why am I giving you this money again? Ms. Question: You don’t know why you’re giving me this money? Why are you a bank teller, anyway? Female Bank Teller: I’m not sure. I really wanted to be a veterinarian. Becky: Mom, it looks like Ms. Question is trying to rob the bank! You stay here and make sure she doesn’t get away. Mrs. Botsford: Where are you going? Becky: Oh, uhhh... Bob wants to see the coin counting machine. Right, Bob? (Bob chatters.) Mrs. Botsford: Oh, dear! I can’t handle Ms. Question alone! (WordGirl and Huggy fly next to her.) WordGirl: Can I help you? Mrs. Botsford: WordGirl! Thank goodness! It looks like Ms. Question is trying to rob the bank. WordGirl: We’d better swing into action, Captain Huggy Face. Word UP! (She flies up to Ms. Question.) WordGirl: Give the stolen money back to the bank right now, Ms. Question! Ms. Question: Why should I listen to you? (She turns around and fires question marks at WordGirl, but she dodges them. WordGirl then looks at the rope barricades, and gets an idea. She pretends to collapse, and gets herself and Huggy tangled in one of the ropes.) WordGirl: Oh! Ow! It looks like we’re in big trouble, Captain Huggy Face. (He tries to get up, but she pushes him back to the ground. He chatters angrily.) WordGirl: (whispering to him) I know we can easily get out of this, but just follow my lead. (in a normal voice) Excuse me, Mrs. Botsford? Mrs. Botsford: Yes! WordGirl: As you can see, we are in some trouble. I was wondering if you wouldn’t mind stopping Ms. Question for us. Mrs. Botsford: I don’t think I can do that, WordGirl! I couldn’t beat her in court. I doubt I can stop her from robbing the bank. WordGirl: Sure, you can. Just concentrate. Ms. Question: (to Mrs. Botsford) Did you think we’d meet again so soon? Mrs. Botsford: I didn’t give it much thought. I’ve been relaxing at home. WordGirl: (with a sarcastic chuckle) Yeah, right. Mrs. Botsford: Did you say something, WordGirl? WordGirl: No. We’re just struggling to get free. Grr! Ugh! She’s stealing the people of the city’s money! And some of that money belongs to the children. Does that sound like justice to you? Mrs. Botsford: Not the children! Hey, Ms. Question-- let’s do this! (Ms. Question tosses down the bags of money and stares at her.) Ms. Question: Who do you think you are? Mrs. Botsford: I’m Sally Botsford-- the city D.A., and it’s my job to bring you to justice! WordGirl: YEAH! (Huggy jumps up enthusiastically, accentuating the fact that he really isn’t trapped, then he stops and smiles sheepishly. Ms. Question then fires a blast of question marks at Mrs. Botsford. Mrs. Botsford picks up one of the metal dividers from the rope barricade, and holds it in front of her face. The question marks bounce off of it and are reflected back onto Ms. Question.) Mrs. Botsford: So, Ms. Question, do you really think you’re cut out for bank robbing? Ms. Question: Why can’t I think of an answer? Mrs. Botsford: Would you like to spend some time in jail and rethink this whole villain thing? Ms. Question: Why am I so confused? (WordGirl and Huggy nod at each other, then she flies over to them and ties the rope barricades around Ms. Question.) Mrs. Botsford: WordGirl! You freed yourself! WordGirl: Yeah... a miracle. You’re a hero, Mrs. Botsford! Mrs. Botsford: Oh, no, I was just doing my job. WordGirl: I’ll take over from here. Mrs. Botsford: Right on, WordGirl! We justice fighters have got to stick together. WordGirl: (to Ms. Question) You look like someone's befuddled you. Ms. Question: Huh? WordGirl: You know, befuddled. It means to confuse. Mrs. Botsford befuddled you with her questions. And now with Mrs. Botsford back on the job, I think you’ll be asking your questions behind bars! (Scene: The Botsford house. Mrs. Botsford is getting ready to leave for work once again. She waves at her family members.) Mrs. Botsford: Now, are you sure you don’t mind that I’m going back to work? I know how much you all enjoyed having me at home. (They all push her toward the door.) Mr. Botsford:: This city needs you to fight for truth and justice. We don’t mind sharing you. TJ: It’s for the common good. Becky: We’ll be fine. Mr. Botsford:: We’re proud of you, honey. Mrs. Botsford: Oh, I’m a very lucky woman to have such a supportive family. Well, ta-ta. (With her standing outside, they close the front door. Everyone in the house starts cheering.) Mrs. Botsford: Oh! Forgot my briefcase. (The door opens, and Tim hands it to her.) Mrs. Botsford: What were you guys cheering about? Mr. Botsford, Becky and TJ: (together) Oh, nothing. TJ: No reason. Just felt like cheering. Mrs. Botsford: Ha ha! Well, off again. (She heads down the sidewalk. Through the front window, we can see everyone dancing and celebrating.) Narrator: And so the city is safe again, now that District Attorney Sally Botsford is back on the job fighting for justice! I would be befuddled if you didn’t tune in next time for another exciting adventure of “WordGirl”! (For the closing scene, we are at the courthouse again, and Ms. Question is being taken away in handcuffs. District Attorney Botsford and the judge give each other a high five.) Category:Transcripts Category:Episodes